IWSG: Millie Writes


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Instead of the July question, I give you Millie.
Dear Insecure Writers and pets of writers, 

Do you remember me? I'm Millie, Mummy's Mal-Shi. I’m four-years-old, and my job is to run the household. Mums is pretty busy this month, so I thought I'd write her post for the IWSG. She didn't asked me to, but I'm kind of pushy that way, so here I am. I want to arf arf a bit about the insecurities of the pets of writers.  

It’s no secret that my mummy likes to write. I'm not here to talk about how much she writes, like all of her free. Instead, I'm here to talk about the neglect that is going on with pets of writers everywhere. 

Her writing begins between 5:15 a.m. and 5:30 each morning, depending on how many times she wallops the alarm's snooze button. When she finally climbs out of bed, she makes her coffee, grunts at me at least once, feeds me and gives me fresh water. She also gives me a complimentary scratch on my head and asks, "Are you ready to go potty?" 

I think its fun to stare at her blankly, acting like I don't know what she's talking about, until she gives up and sits on the couch. About the time the metal pet occupies her lap and I see her fingers petting the metal pet, I run to the door and wait.


After we come back in, I race to the couch to get my place on her lap, but she shoos me away and picks up the metal pet again. I don't  get the attraction. MP isn't fuzzy like me and doesn't lick all exposed skin areas. 

MP is weird and cold, but I really tried to make friends. I tried:


- to give MP kisses. Mummy called it slobbering and said to cut it out.

- jumping on top of it, but Mummy said, "No!" 
carefully stepping on its letters. I mean, what pet has letters? 
- making MP jealous by licking Mum's feet, shoving my nose up her pant leg and licking her leg, licking her hand and licking her coffee cup. 

That's a lot of licking even for me, but I am blessed with great slobber glands. MP didn't even care.

Mummy also writes before going to bed. When MP sits on her lap, Mums says she is writing and I must understand. So I think of ways to get her full attention like at night
 when I go outside. After I'm done doing my business, I freeze and stare into the darkness and don't answer her calls to come inside.

Mums: Come on, Millie, get in the house. You don't see anything. 
I think Mummy is HOPING I don't see anything, but you know the writer brain. 

I've concluded that as a pet of a writer, you must assert yourself or you could be left behind. In fact, if you are a pet of a writer try being a writer, too. It “seems” easy enough. 
As I see it, all you have to do is:
-Tune the world out,
-Develop an early morning growl,
-Drink coffee, if you can handle it,
-Type with your tongue on the Metal Pet if you don't have fingers, AND
-Let your imagination loose.
I’ve even decided on my author name! Are you ready? M. Powell Coltrin. Like it?

Lots of arff (love), 
M. Powell Coltrin 

Comments

Crystal Collier said…
LOL! Happy 4th to you! My kids would echo some of that, although once they can read, I just tell them to find a good book while I write. ;)
You are one determined dog. Not sure you're going to win that battle though.
I loved this! Millie, you made me smile this morning. Maybe you taught my Finn that blank stare at the words "let's potty." :) Love your very familiar-sounding author name!
Pat Hatt said…
haha the cat has gone across the keys a time or ten too. They really love that metal pet.
emaginette said…
Millie is as cute as button. Cliches exist for a reason. hehehe

Anna from elements of emaginette
Nick Wilford said…
Very fun! My dogs tend to rest their chins on my laptop. I don't think they like it either.
Fundy Blue said…
Arf! Arf! Millie, this is delightful. I think you have a future as writer M. Powell Coltrin. Sorry to read how much attention MP is taking away from you!
Anonymous said…
You can never go wrong with animals! My cat Hemi, has played with the 'metal pet' a time or two, as well!
Hi Millie - you sure have got clever and worked your way round things - now I think and hope you're going to settle down with your own piece of metal and write your story - probably a series I see coming - cheers Hilary
Chrys Fey said…
I'm not even up that early to write. I'm not a morning person. lol So I admire those writers who get up to write before their day officially begins. I wish I was like that. :)

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