"Keep scribbling! Something will happen." Frank McCourt

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

It's Funny What You Remember


As a child I had a reoccurring dream. It wasn't an every day dream or even an every month dream. It was just a dream once in awhile.

My mom and I were on a bus...a serious bus...like a Greyhound bus. The bus was full of people. In the dream I see two nuns sitting near the front. My mom and I were sitting in front of the nuns.

At some point, my mom hands me to one of the nuns. I resisted. I cried. I felt very stressed about it.


My mother walks to the back of the bus and that's about it, except she doesn't come back.


Weird huh?


Over the years, I mentioned this dream to my mom, to my dad, to anyone who was listening.


I stopped having the dream once I married and moved away. But a few years ago, maybe ten, I mentioned the dream again. It was at that point, that my mother kind of had an Ah Ha moment. This is what she told me.

When I was around the age in the picture above, but I think a little younger, I was playing, fell, and put a gash behind my ear. I bled and it was very traumatic for my young parents. They took me to an emergency room.

We lived in Joliet, Illinois so I imagine it was a hospital nearby.




The photo (above) was my home. (I wish I had it sitting in my backyard today, where I could restore it.)

My mother told me that it was a Catholic hospital and there were nuns everywhere. I was bleeding and needed to be looked at, so one of the nuns took me from my mother. Of course, I started to cry. (I am very attached to my mom...even today...and yes if you grab me from her I WILL cry. You are duly warned.) The nuns would not let my folks go with me. I cried and they could hear me, that probably made it worse on both parents and child, I imagine.

I had to have stitches behind my ear. And my parents had to fill out paperwork in the meantime to explain what had happened. The hospital was probably suspicious. Those silly people didn't know that either one of my good parents would have given their life for me... in a blink...even today. They are that good.

So here is my question. Did the trauma that I experienced, at that very young age, imprint upon my brain the image of nuns taking me from my mother on the bus? Was the reoccurring dream just really a memory? My psychologist daughter said in her learning years she read about people (I think she said really intelligent people, but I could be making that up) remembering things from when they were very young.

It's funny what you remember...huh?

Reminder: If you haven't entered my 100th Post drawing it's not too late!


14 comments:

  1. Our minds can play little tricks with us. Place us in one spot one day and make us think another experience, that happened days or months later, is related in some way. I have similar memories that come back to me. It's nice being able to remember things, even if they arew a bit dis-jointed.

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  2. i think it is about our sub-conscious we push our memories there and our tricky mind sometimes makes us remember them in an different way or create illusions...
    anyway, i must tell that this pic is so cute((:
    take care of urself

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  3. I agree with your daughter. Some memories somehow reoccur in our dreams.Particularly the ones we don't one to remember.

    The pic is very cute. I want to pinch your cheeks.

    Kepp well!!!

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  4. Memories are strange critters, sometimes.

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  5. I had so many odd, random memories from being very small--when I asked my mother about them, the reality was very different from my perception of them.

    Elizabeth
    Mystery Writing is Murder

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  6. Don't you love finding meaning in childhood reminiscences? Maybe when you're feeling in your life the same anxiety you felt as a young girl in the hospital, you have that dream tying it to the childhood experience/anxiety?

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  7. Three things I remember: Spiders. Dumping a cup of water on us in bed after dozing off. My sister sleeping with her eyes open, scaring the you know what out of me.
    Do you still have the little nun 'we' got you for Christmas? (evil laugh)
    Tammy

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  8. Lesley, I like the word disjointed and I will add to that -memories for -disjointed memories. See how good we work together?

    Tugce, Minds are so tricky, I agree. Thank you on the cuteness of the photo.

    Yagmur, I laughed over your wanting to "pinch your cheeks".

    Gail, Yes, memories can be strange and distorted.

    Elizabeth, I have done that too, thinking I remember something just find out that I might have put two memories together.

    Joanne, I agree that present feelings can trigger past feelings that can bring memories to the mind... or in my case maybe into a dream.

    Tammy, I don't know who you are, but HOW RUDE to say the "spider" word. Ok ok, this is my sister. BTW, spilling the glass of water on me as I slept was not a dream. Poor me. Sniff sniff. And yes, I have the nun doll that you all gave me for Christmas. Again, HOW RUDE. :) I should have photographed that and posted it.

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  9. I was so engrossed in your story that I did not hear the news commentator my husband was listening to and he is asking me what I thought of the news bit. I totally missed it. lol I love that you got your story explained. Many times adults may do things for the so called best of us, but they leave us disjointed. Now we are adults and it is our turn. Hopefully we will do better.

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  10. It's always fascinating to see how the brain transforms memory and turns it into something both more distant and yet more relevant, with layers.

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  11. Wow, it sure does sound familiar, and the bus, greyhound bus, might just represent your home back then. How cool.

    I used to have a weird dream where I could fly. It'd haunt me at the weirdest times. I haven't a clue where it came from.

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  12. Judy, Apologize to your husband for me! :) It's funny how it took years for me to sorta put it together.

    DevonEllington, Welcome! I agree the layers of memory in the brain are fascinating. We never know what might be lurking there.

    Eileen, I hadn't thought of the bus representing home. See how this might never end? :)

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  13. Wow, your daughter sounds really intelligent! And I bet she's gorgeous and wonderful, too! ;)

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  14. The jury is still out on that one. Hee hee. I have to keep her humble you know.

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