"Keep scribbling! Something will happen." Frank McCourt

Monday, May 24, 2010

Mammos, Family, and Other Ramblings

Congratulations to Jane Kennedy Sutton at Jane's Ride for winning the coffee plaque.  She blogs about writing and her journey as a writer. (Email me your address, Jane, and I will send it your way.)

Last Week and Me
Tuesday I was invited to my granddaughters grandparent day (hour).  It was a great time. After a short program, K was to read a book to myself and her other gran. She read two. There were two little girls without GPs there. So at one point the teacher told one of the little girl's to go read to me. She came over and read a couple of books -kind of. Then K was back with the card she had made to read to us. I gave her my attention. She's pretty darn perfect - just want you to know. Then the little girl who had been assigned to me put one little hand on my shoulder and pressed her cheek to mine and hugged. I'm glad the teacher sent her my way.

Then it was the boys' turn the next day. Problem was, there programs were both at the same time. No problem, those kids have many GP's. So I went to my oldest grandson's room and the other grandson had a grandfather with him. We all got to see each other in the cafeteria during refreshments. So that was good.

Thursday night, little granddaughter had a Patriotic Program. It was cute.  Dr. Lovely Daughter and I went to a local eating place after -for a bite to eat.

Speaking of the daughter, she closed on her first home this week. She is now a homeowner. We packed things Saturday. She has set up the movers for this coming Thursday. We were going to go to Silver Dollar City on Saturday, but decided to pack instead. She's needs to be ready for Thursday.  Her new house is very pretty. She will love it.

The Ruralhood (my other blog) has a new post if you're interested. It's about a tree, two children, and a near death experience titled Felling Trees. (You can access it in the sidebar.)

Next on the give-a-way list in honor of my 200th post is the Dream journal. All you have to do to enter is comment or if you prefer -email me. The drawing will be next Sunday with the announcement of the winner on Monday.

If you don't want to read about mammography then you need to stop right now, because I think mammography is funny and I wrote about it.
You might disagree saying that a mammogram is physically painful and psychologically damaging to women and and not so funny. You might be correct. YOU might even blame a man for creating it. You might even say that if it were a man being “clamped” then suddenly there would be a non-invasive lifesaving test that could detect cancer early. YOU might not say these things, but I do. And I will say that I think mammograms are comical and necessary.

This is what I find funny about mammograms.

You are standing at the mammo machine (I won’t tell you how I got there), the clamp is lowered (I won’t tell you about that either) and you are waiting for the technician to take the picture. The technician tells you to hold your breath so she can capture the image. But you are screaming in your mind, “Hold my breath?  I haven’t breathed since you took my booble (breast) hostage.” (Try using that word on your next visit, I dare you.)

Another visit, I am almost ready to be imaged when I asked the technician, “So, what if you should fall dead at my feet, is there a release button?” She laughed. I said, “No really, what happens if you die? Is there a button within reach, a command, or a tripwire that I might use to release this machine from its hold?" She said, “No, you would have to scream.” I said, “There is no way that I can scream under this kind of - pressure.” She said, “There’s no button.” I left seeking legislation on the matter.

Then there is the worry of regarding your shape. Will you ever be the same again? You find the answer when you put your bra back on and it doesn’t fit. Immediately, you feel the need to head to the nearest thrift store to purchase pointy bras from the 1950's to fit your new shape. But, as you are walking to your car, you hear a loud pop and realize your shape has returned.

If you haven’t had one yet or are about to have your first mammo, keep in mind that after the procedure your boobles will be in shock for the rest of the day- just so you know. However, sometime that evening all blood flow will return and you will be heading for the ibuprofen.

And that’s why I think mammography is a funny and necessary procedure.

16 comments:

  1. Sounds like you had a great time with the grand little ones.

    Love your take on the mammography, especially the release button. Have a great day. (Thanks for the laugh).

    Mason
    Thoughts in Progress

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  2. Wow, grandparents days sounded fun. I love the mammo stories, that's so funny and yet, I cringe to have to go through it.

    CD

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  3. Oh, My, the "pop" and they're back in shape. LOL!! Speaking of bras and boobles...we're on the same wavelength. My post was on bras (thanks for commenting) and I'm going for my mammo next week. My techie gal talks books w/me, which relaxes me some, and by the time I get through the list of all my faves, she's done. Pop!

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  4. Ha! Loved the pointy bra idea...at least they pop back into shape. :)

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  5. Hi Teresa .. so pleased the GPs were involved - kids are just so great .. and they'll remember you were there!

    The mammo .. are 'horrific' - hadn't thought about being stuck there .. just hope no sci-fi writer reads this .. he'll use it? Boob barbed for ever ..

    Enjoy the week .. Hilary

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  6. Reminds me-- it's that time again! I don't think they're so bad, but I just hate the thought of it.

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  7. Oh my, I’m so excited! I have the perfect spot for the plaque on my desk. Thanks.

    I love being a grandparent and being able to do those special little school events – sounds like you do too.

    Your mammogram story was great – especially the part about the release button. I’d never thought of that, but know it will cross my mind the next time I go for one. Laughing about serious topics is always good therapy for me.

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  8. I could use a plaque like that. Only with a manly-man background. And in blue. Coffee has gotten me through many a tough times.

    Stephen Tremp

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  9. (.) (.) These are my boobs.

    _ _ These are my boobs after
    a MAMMOGRAM.

    :0( Any questions?

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  10. Mammograms are not a laughing matter in fact they're very dangerous and should be banned from the U.S. and around the world.

    www.cochrane.dk

    The susan G. comen brochures do not educate people on the pros and cons of MAMMOGRAMS.

    Not only is the ionizing radiation harmful but the compressions as well.

    Mammograms will give you breast cancer. No age is a good age for a MAMMOGRAM.

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  11. MC, I had a super time with the grands.

    Mary, Well ya gotta laugh or ya gotta cry. I laugh.

    Elizabeth, The pointy bras- I mean what was that fashion statement about.

    HIlary, I am always "what if mode".

    Karen, good. I believe in them.

    Jane, You're welcome. We could talk grands all day - I bet.

    Stephen, I totally understand! :) Coffee may just be my best friend- I'm just saying.

    Corrine, Thanks for your opinion, I appreciate it. I know ladies that a mammogram has detected cancer and helped saved their lives from cancer that could have ravaged their bodies undetected. thanks for coming by.

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  12. I'm focusing on blogs by and about writing and I just found yours. I've got lots to read (excited about that) will also check out Ruralhood and...the "other Kennedy" :)

    The Right Time to Write was great! excuses, current, past and future ....

    glad I found you! MonkeyME

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  13. Your welcome and I wish that it was just my opinion, but sorry to say those are facts. Mammograms are very dangerous and no one should be getting them ever.

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  14. GM, Welcome, I'm glad you found me too. Come back soon.

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  15. Lmao! Omg, I almost spit water all over my computer when you spoke about the needed release button. Thank you so much for the laugh. :)

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  16. Spending time with the grands is very special and memorable.

    Now the other topic is memorable. lol

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